The Physical

I was due for a physical. Considering I can't remember the last time I had one, I figured it was due. I always go for the female stuff but never for blood work or anything exciting like that. So, I showed up at the doctor at 830 after fasting for 12 hours. I was ready to eat! No coffee did not help. Blood pressure is normal, a good start since I was off the charts when I was pregnant. The nurse hands me the stylish paper towel shirt and skirt and actually tells me to throw it away after the doctor left. I guess she was expecting me to keep it to wear it another time. The doctor comes in about 45 minutes after I put on the getup. He does the breast check first, I hate that the most of the whole exam. I have known my doctor for 10 years and still feel like he is pushing the limits by touching my chest. It is just icky, we don't have that friendly of a relationship. I don't make him turn his head and cough. When that is done, he moves on to the part of the exam where I am supposed to relax. Whatever... It is hard to relax when there is a hand squeezing my ovaries. He says, "Bye," and I can get dressed. I am off to be drained of blood for my cholesterol tests. Three hours later, I am set free from the doctor's office. I immediately head for Taco Bell.