Thursday, April 3, 2008

Little People, Big World

Forever, it seems, I have had an interest in "little people." I'm not sure why. I have never known any little people, only seen them in the mall, on TV and in the Seattle airport. My first experience in learning more came from none other than Maury Povich. Apparently, there was a shortage of women needing to confirm who their babies daddies were so Maury invited some primordial dwarfs on the show. The first kids he featured were like 14 and 16 and were so tiny. I think their names were Bre and Brad but it has been awhile, so I can't be for sure. They were both sweet kids with high pitched, baby voices. Bre and Brad didn't seem bitter about their short stature and were a breath of fresh air! They were both cheerleaders and lived the life that seemed to be reserved for people of a greater height. I loved them.

We were returning from our wedding/Christmas vacation and right there in the food court of the Seattle airport was a family of little people. They had pulled up a low table to eat their lunch on. I stared like an idiot. Bobby caught me and, knowing of my interest, told me to eat because we had to get on the plane. I snuck them a little wave. They waved back, I'm sure, confirming to them, that I was truly an idiot.

Like they are reading my mind, TLC creates a show, about little people and how they get along in a big person's world, hence, the name, "Little People, Big World." I feel ripped off because it was an idea in the back of my brain for years and I have to let them reap the benefit. The show centers around Matt, Amy and their 4 kids, one who is little. His name is Zach and he loves soccer. I don't even recall the names of the other kids. Zach's brother has an annoying set of curls on his head and he is tall. I don't claim to know more because they just aren't very interesting.

The show centers on how they get along, from running a farm, which, if you want to get down to it, a regular sized person runs, drives a car, organizes a household full of people and how they travel. There house and cars are fitted to their size, ie low cabinets and appliances etc. The house is pretty nice, actually. Whomever redesigned and paid for the remodel did a fine job. The family travels to locations I can only dream about. Like the time they went to Hawaii and rode the zip lines. Like the time they went to the Caribbean and sailed on a gigantic sailboat. Like the place they get to go to next. They are a very privileged family, note sarcastic undertone.

They are also probably the messiest, most disorganized family I have ever seen. Professional organizers came to revamp some of their crap. It didn't help. Their "stuff" is literally everywhere. I'm not talking about a few dirty dishes in the sink or laundry on the floor in the bedrooms. I am talking, shit everywhere, on all surfaces. Clothes, dishes, backpacks, books, you name it. There is literally not a clear place to put anything! How can they live like this?

I still haven't figured out how they manage anything but that is ok. Some people, short or tall, fat or thin, can't make things work no matter who foots the bill for things. Of course, if someone offered me a fancy trip, new grill and, or a bunch of other cool stuff, I might clean up my crap once in awhile.I don't hold it against them, this complete lack of tidiness. After all, I am regular sized and not too tidy myself.

My interest in little people will probably last forever. I know it is a little unusual. Someone once told me there is little people porn. I think that I will definitely pass on that! For now, I hope for the best for little Bre and Brad and hope they never give up their sweet attitudes and remain happy. As for Matt, Amy and the bunch, please have someone pay to get you a housekeeper.

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